Dear Cousin Prakash: I wish that I could have known you better

The gentleman sitting with the boy on his lap is Prakash and the boy is his son, Karthik. Next to them sits Akila, the wife of Prakash. Sadly, she is now a widow and Karthik without a father, as Prakash lost his life just before the New Year began when he was struck by a bus in India. Prakash was 42.

I call him "cousin" in the title to this entry not because of any relationship of blood between us, because there is none, but to honor him and the family connection that first drew us together on the evening of August 22, 2007. That connection was the pre-wedding reception of my niece, Khena, to his nephew, Vivek, held in Bangalore in the south India state of Karnataka. 

Now Vivek is my nephew, too, and, by my way of thinking, that makes his Uncle Prakash my cousin.

I have a project in my head that I long to carry out, and that is to journey back into the places of origin and current habitation of all of my extended family, from the Apache and Navajo Indian Reservations of Arizona, the Mormon heartland of Utah and Southern Idaho, elsewhere in the Rocky Mountains, the coast of California,  the Midwest, Deep South, the East Coast and now India.

My purpose would be to photograph as wide a swath of my family as I can, and to tell what I can of the stories of this large, diverse, family that could not have been imagined by any member of it a little more than one generation ago.

This is from the next day, August 23, 2007, at the wedding. The very beautiful young lady that Prakash holds is niece Vaishnavi, also known as Sonal.

By itself, my ancient, new, family in India is large and diverse and though I met many of them at the wedding, in most cases, these were fleeting encounters. I have been privileged to get to know a few of them a little better. Vivek, of course; his parents, Murthy and Vashanti, who not only put me up for my final days in India, but visited us here in Alaska this past May, after which we all went down to Alta, Utah, to celebrate the second wedding of Vivek and Khena; Nephew Vijay - Vivek's brother - and his wife, Vidya, a friend to all animals and the mother of beautiful baby girl Vaidehi, born this past spring even as her grandparents were visiting us.

Through Cyberspace, we communicate regularly and send pictures back and forth.

Vivek's cousin Ganesh took me on a tour of Bangalore and is also special to my heart. Ganesh has two sisters, Soundarya (Sandy) and Sujitha (Barbie), both of whom will wed next month - Soundarya on Valentine's Day, which is also Margie and my wedding anniversary, and Sujitha the very next day, February 15.

It had long been the plan of both Soundarya and me that I would return to India to photograph her wedding, as we have shared an exceptionally special relationship since we met. I call her "Muse" and many of my days have been brightened by the mere appearance of a "sandyz" mail in my inbox.

I thought that on this second trip to India, I would begin to track down my new family members of south Asia; I would photograph them, both in portrait and candid form, visit with them, and begin to learn their stories.

But there was a communication mixup, and Sandy's wedding wound up being scheduled during the one event taking place here in Alaska this winter that I absolutely cannot miss.

Prakash, his beautiful wife and energetic son were among those I had hoped to photograph and visit.

Now, I do not know when I will return to India. To be honest, given the kind of year 2008 was for me, I lack the financial resources - although for Soundarya and Anil's wedding - and Sujitha's, too - a lack of resources would not have stopped me.

But I will return, because my family in India is exceptionally important to me. When I do, Prakash will not be there. His ashes were set free at his funeral in Chennai, but I will still learn what I can of him, and of Akila and Karthik, who I do hope to photograph.

For now, all I can do is to send my condolences. 

Comments

[Sandy]

Dad will be very pleased to see this...

Thank you Bill.

[Wasilla, Alaska, by 300]

And thank you, Sandy. You are all fast in my heart and on my mind daily.