A blog by Bill Hess

Running Dog Publications

P.O. Box 872383 Wasilla, Alaska 99687

 

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Wasilla

Wasilla is the place where I have lived for the past 29 years - sort of. The house in which my wife and I raised our family sits here, but I have made my rather odd career as a different sort of photojournalist by continually wandering off to other places to photograph people and gather information, which I have then put together in various publications that have served the Alaska Native Eskimo, Indian and Aleut communities.

Although I did not have a great of free time to devote to this rather strange community, named after a Tanaina Athabascan Indian chief who knew Wasilla in the way that I so impossibly long to, I have still documented it regularly over the past quarter-century plus. In the early days, my Wasilla photographs focused mostly upon my children and the events they participated in - baseball, football, figure skating, hockey, frog catching, fire cracker detonation, Fourth of July parade - that sort of thing. 

In 2002, I purchased my first digital camera and then, whenever I was home, I began to photograph Wasilla upon a daily basis, but not in a conventional way. These were grab shots - whatever caught my eye as I took my many long walks or drove through the town, shooting through the car window at people and scenes that appeared and disappeared before I could even focus and compose in the traditional photographic way.

Thus, the Wasilla portion of this blog will be devoted both to the images that I take as I wander about and those that I have taken in the past. Despite the odd, random, nature of the images, I believe they communicate something powerful about this town that I have never seen expressed anywhere else. 

Wasilla is a sprawling community that has been slapped down hodge-podge upon what was so recently wilderness of the most exquisite beauty. In its design, it is deliberately anti-zoned, anti-planned. In the building of Wasilla, the desire to make a buck has trumped aesthetics and all other considerations. This town, built in the midst of exquisite beauty, has largely become an unsightly, unattractive, mess of urban sprawl. Largely because of this, it often seems to me that Wasilla is a community with no sense of community, a town devoid of town soul.

Yet - Wasilla is my home and if I am lucky it will be until I grow old and die. Despite its horrific failings, it is still made of the stuff of any small city: people; moms and dads, grammas and grampas, teens, children, churches, bars, professionals, laborers, soldiers, missionaries, artists, athletes, geniuses, do-gooders, hoodlums, the wealthy, the homeless, the rational and logical, the slightly insane and the wholly insane - and, yes, as is now obvious to the whole world, politicians, too.

So perhaps, if one were to search hard enough, it might just be possible to find a sense of community here, and a town soul. So, using my skills as a photojournalist and a writer, I hope to do just that. If this place has a sense of community, I will find it. If there is a town soul to Wasilla, I will document it. I won't compete with the newspapers. Hell no! But as time and income allow, it will be fun to wander into the places where the folks described above gather, and then put what I find on this blog.

 

by 300...

Anywhere within a 300 mile radius of Wasilla. This encompasses perhaps the most wild, dramatic, gorgeous, beautiful section of land and sea to be found in any comparable space anywhere on Earth. I can never explore it all, but I will do the best that I can, and will here share what I find and experience with you.  

and then some...

Anywhere else in the world that I happen to get to, such as Point Lay, Alaska; Missoula, Montana; Serenki, Chukotka, Russia; or Bangalore, India. Perhaps even Lagos, Nigeria. I have both a desire and scheme to get me there. It is a long shot. We shall see if I succeed.

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Entries in traffic (70)

Thursday
Nov042010

Exhausted, he crawls down Shrock Road, trying to envision the next ten years, trying to figure out how to shuck responsibility and get his work done

Yes, here I am, yesterday afternoon, crawling my way up Schrock Road, exhausted, sipping at an Americano bought from Carmen at Metro, wondering how to make what I want to happen these next ten years happen.

I must add a magazine to this blog. I simply cannot refine any kind of story in blog format. In a blog, you get the daily slog. A little piece of the story here, another there - this one left out altogether because even though maybe you got it in your camera and in your notes and your recordings and you think it more vital and compelling than what you have so far posted, the date just keeps changing and you must move on before you can complete it.

So this will be kind of an experiment - the daily slog, portrayed in the blog, and then at some point the refined stories in the magazine. 

I don't know how to do it - how to set it up, how to fund it. But, damnit, I feel it in me - a force, driving me irrevocably toward it. Me, wandering here, wandering there, mostly in Alaska but not totally - not when there is a place like India sitting out there, waiting for me to come back, and Argentina, awaiting my first arrival - meeting people, photographing people, conveying slivers of their stories, which are my stories, and your stories. Sometimes not traveling, but just staying home for long periods of time, telling the stories around me, dredging out past black and white negatives to tell those stories, too - as I saw them then, as they have evolved - to revisit and look upon the faces of those so vital when I photographed them, dead now, existing only in memories, some of which I have been fortunate to capture in slivers lasting maybe 1/250th of a second in length.

We are all part of one big story, only pieces of which ever get told and no one ever gets to learn but a few of these stories, yet, in these few, everything is told, even if what is told is very little of the whole.

So, if I can be so fortunate as to get ten more years of life and functionable health, I will do it. I don't know how, but I will.

And then you know what? At the end, once I am dead and gone, some clever person will take it all and condense it into a narrated slide show that will tell the whole story in one hour - maybe half-an-hour. Ninety minutes, if I am lucky.

Ha! I'll be dead. Luck won't matter to me then. I will be neither lucky nor unlucky - just past.

Maybe tomorrow, I will break away from everything, take you surfing, tell you how I came to be a photographer.

Maybe not. That is a blog post that will take a little time to put together, and I am afraid that I have been spending too much time on this blog and must force myself to cut back for awhile.

That is the contradiction. In truth, I cannot spend too much time on this blog. No matter how much time I spend working on it, it is not enough - not enough to accomplish what I want to do, to tell the stories I want to tell. But I have to force myself to break away from it, to push it aside, because I need to feed Margie. I need to keep a roof over her head.

I must buy cat food, and kitty litter.

Sometimes, despite all the love I feel, I just hate responsibility. I just want to take pictures, and to write. Thats all I want to do. I don't want to be responsible. Responsibility is getting in the way of my work. Responsibility is interfering with my work.

So I must find a way to shuck responsibility, bear down on my work (which is not only blogging and such, but books too - towards which I am making slow progress). I do not know how to do it, I have no resources to do it. I am exhausted.

But I have the desire - strong desire. And I have the drive.

Is desire and drive enough to overcome exhaustion and lack of resource?

 

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Friday
Oct292010

Arctic people join Larry Aiken in Anchorage to celebrate his birthday and wish him many more; I drive home through snow, atop ice

Yesterday was Larry Aiken's 56th birthday. In the early evening, I drove to Anchorage for the party. As recently noted, Larry has come down from Barrow to get his cancer treated.

We gathered around for pie and cake. Celebrants filled their cups with lemonade and Pepsi and then made a toast to Larry on his birthday - a toast for long life and many more birthdays.

There were others who came and went during the course of the party, but these are those who were present with Larry when I took this group picture: Charlie, Candace, Lloyd, James (who had come down from Anaktuvuk Pass for eye surgery), Martha, Art and Harley.

Everybody sang happy birthday.

Then there was another toast.

Of course, I was there too and I took this picture to reflect my presence - us, gathered together in lightness and warmth in defiance of the cold dark beyond the window.

Yet, even beyond the window there was warmth. We went out. A light, wet, snow was falling. We gathered around the fire. Larry spoke about how much the warmth and support of his friends meant to him now. He has felt fear, and has shed tears. He will feel more fear and shed more tears, yet in friendship and love he finds courage and faith.

Although we could not hear it here, we all knew that in Barrow, many people were calling in to KBRW's daily "Birthday Program" to wish Larry a happy one.

Martha took my camera away from me so that she could take some pictures that included me. So here is the one that I like the best - me, Larry and Art.

I think I will post it as my Facebook Profile picture for awhile.

The drive home was a bit nerve-wracking. The rain that had begun in the afternoon had now turned to snow. The temperature stood right at freezing. The highway was slick and dangerous. Some drivers, apparently new to this place and this kind of thing, creapt along at 10 mph. Others, overconfident, proud and impatient, weaved and shot their way through the traffic in their big four-wheel drive vehicles at 60 plus - until finally the flow just bogged down to an unpassable 40.

These are the ones that you most often see turned over at the side of the road - big, four-wheel drive vehicles driven by people who do not understand that the laws of physics also apply to them.

Fortunately, I saw no bad mishaps on this drive home.

For a Thursday night, the traffic seemed pretty heavy to me. I wondered why? Sarah Palin had thrown a rally in Anchorage for Joe Miller. I wondered if that might be the reason - thousands of Palin/Miller supporters streaming back into the valley after a rousing rally for Joe Miller.

But no... according to news reports, only 300 to 400 people attended - and that includes the Anchorage people as well as the valley.

So that wasn't it.

Maybe the traffic just seemed heavy, because weather conditions caused drivers to bunch up.

It took longer than usual, but finally I was in Wasilla, where the snowfall greatly eased. Then I was on Brockton, approaching the very dark corner ahead. Fortunately, I have good headlights. They cut through the darkness before me and showed me the way to the warmth and light of home.

 

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Wednesday
Sep222010

Time forces this blog back into Wasilla, but it will return to Cross Island tomorrow and will romp with polar bears

After spending too many hours* working on what I had planned to be today's Cross Island post, I realized that it would still take me a couple of hours more to finish it. So I stopped, put it off until tomorrow and then quickly pulled these three Wasilla pictures off my pocket camera.

I was having great fun - because it is fun to wander among polar bears on your screen when you know that they can't hurt you, but, really, I can't afford to spend that much time working on this blog in a single day, especially when I did so just the day before, and the day before that as well, so I decided to spread the work on the polar bear entry out over two days.

So here I am in Wasilla in my car a couple of days back, before I drove to Nikiski.

I am on Church Road. I have been directed into the left lane and a flag lady up ahead is ordering me to drive slow.

Judging from the stain on the road, it would appear that someone crashed here recently, although this had nothing to do with that but rather with road repair.

And this was Sunday morning, after I had returned from Nikiski late the night before. Whenever I come back from a trip, I always try to take Margie to breakfast the next morning. True - this had been a very short trip of just one night, but tradition is tradition.

Regular readers know that Margie and I have been on a strange routine, lately. When I am home, I pick her up from babysitting Jobe in Anchorage on Thursday nights, then take her back Monday morning.

I was so tired this Monday that Margie volunteered to drive herself to Anchorage and said that I could just stay home, sleep in and use my bicycle that day.

Oddly enough, I found that I greatly enjoyed not having a car but only a bicycle.

So we did the same thing today. 

I think we will do it tomorrow, too.

The only problem is, I bought a new plecostomus to eat the algae that is taking over one of my acquariums, as the pleco who used to live there died, but I couldn't bring it home. They said they would be open until 7:00, but Margie didn't get back home until about 7:30. 

And here I am, at Metro Cafe, after pedaling over on my bike.

That's Jason Starheim in the photo with Carmen. Jason is her nephew through one of Scott's brothers.

Scott is fighting hard, staying as busy and active as he can as he battles his horrible cancer. Jason has come to help out around the cafe.

Tomorrow, I will return this blog to Cross Island and will drop you into the midst of polar bears. It will be fun. You will enjoy it.

 

*Note: I actually created this entry last night. Before I went to bed, I set it to publish for 7:00 AM this morning. I'm afraid that in Squarespace my blog hosts have created a trouble-plagued platform filled with many inefficiencies and time wasting features where anything can go wrong at any time and today Squarespace did not publish as scheduled. I just discovered it, and am about to manually post it.

 

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Friday
Jul092010

I get cluster-bombed by a spammer; undoing the damage takes up all of my blogging time today

When I got up this morning and came out to check up on the online world, I was amazed to open up my email and see that a huge, huge, number of comments had come into my blog, dropped in all over the place. They were all spam, from someone claiming to sell football jerseys with links back to his site - a phishing site.

So I had to go through and remove every one. I have no more time left to blog today.

I have always resisted the idea of putting filters on my comments and have just left them open so that anyone could leave a comment at any time without having to type in any kind of code like you see on so many sites and without having to wait for my approval to see their comment appear.

For the most part, this has worked well. From time to time, a bit of spam has worked its way in but the numbers have been small enough that it was not that difficult to remove.

As bad and time consuming as today's cluster-bombing was, it occurs to me that it could be much worse, that the robot that did this could probably do the same to every single post that I have ever put up and multiple times - and could just keep them coming. It could create a situation that would be almost impossible to deal with.

So, sadly, with great reluctance, I have decided that I must put some filters up for my comments.

I would also note that yesterday in my statistics I saw a strange pattern emerge, where someone would come to visit from the "Bloggers Choice Awards" site and then would hop about my site, downloading pictures.* Later, the same thing would happen again.

My theory was that this was a very dedicated voter who was downloading pictures from various sites so that s/he could study and compare before casting an informed vote.

Now I think it was the spammer, because every site that I remember seeing appear in this manner got spammed. I do not know what they intend to do with my downloaded pictures.* The same pattern is repeating itself today, so I think the same perpetrator is preparing another cluster bomb attack for tonight.

As to the above image, I drove into Anchorage late yesterday afternoon to pick Margie up from her Jobe-babysitting stint in Anchorage, as Lavina has today off and so Margie would not be needed.

I am still jet-lagged and yesterday morning I woke up just before 2:00 AM and could not go back to sleep, so I got up at 2:30 and stayed up. I felt okay most of the day until I picked Margie up and then it all hit me, so I asked if she would drive home and she did. At one point, I was trying to nap but I opened my eyes and saw this blue pickup truck turn off the freeway onto the exit just ahead of us. 

I thought what was about to happen might make a good picture, so I removed my pocket camera from my shirt pocket and shot. I then put my camera back in my pocket and closed my eyes again. 

I may just wait until Sunday to post again. Now that it is summer, I find that on Saturday's the visits to my site drop way, way, down as people go out to play. I wouldn't mind playing a bit myself.

*Update: I have done a little research and have learned that anytime a viewer looks at one of my images in slideshow view, statistics shows it as a "picture download," even though no picture has actually been downloaded into someone else's computer. So this is a bit of a relief. It does not appear that the spammer downloaded my pictures at all.

Thursday
May132010

Even though I had to worry about chips and dings, I witnessed some pretty marvelous sights from the Kendall Ford loaner car

Last week, I brought up the fact that the "check engine" light had come on in our Escape and that I had taken it to the shop at Kendall Ford, got the problem diagnosed, made an appointment and had then dropped it off very early in the morning for what was supposed to be a two-and-a-half to three hour repair. Yet, come the end of that day, I learned that it had proven much more complicated than that and I could not pick up the car. They would have to keep it for another day.

I had planned to follow the story through, but I got sidetracked by matters such as Jobe's baby shower and my Mother's Day tribute.

So today I got up thinking that, concerning this story, I had blown it. The time had passed. It was too late to post it now and that I might just as well forget about it, pretend that it never happened and let the pictures that I took to illustrate it slip quietly away into that vast, unseen, archive that holds the big majority of images that I have ever shot.

Then I decided, what the hell - this is not a daily newspaper, this is my blog, I can do with it whatever I want. I don't always need to be perfectly timely. Ultimately, my goal is to continually wrap the past and the present together here, anyway, so what's wrong with wrapping in the recent past?

Anyway, no matter how current the images and the memories, by the time I post them here they are the past. So, here goes:

Come the next day, I waited and waited for the call that would tell me the car was done. My plan then was to ride my bike the five or six miles to Kendall and pickup the car. Or, if Caleb was awake, I might have him take me. Instead, near the end of the day, I got a call from Mark, my intermediary at Kendall, and he informed me that in the process of making the repair, the mechanics had accidently ruptured the fuel line and it was leaking gasoline.

They had ordered a part from Anchorage, but would have to hold the car for at least one more day, possibly two.

Mark said they could provide me with a loaner car and they could send someone to my house to pick me up and drive me over. "Okay," I said.

This is Ginger, the driver who came to get me. Ginger spoke with a strong southern accent.

Ginger has two jobs at Kendall - driving customers like me back and forth and doing custodial work. 

"It's either cleaning a urinal, or driving a customer... cleaning a urinal, or driving a customer... cleaning a urinal, or driving a costumer," she expounded. "Which one do you think I'd rather be doing?"

Yet, driving customers was not so pleasant that morning when two women were killed in a head-on collision just a few hundred yards up the Park's Highway from Kendall Ford. It was a busy morning, but she found herself repeatedly stuck in slow traffic as she crept by the accident scene.

Her theory was that the woman who had crossed over the suicide-left turn lane and into the oncoming traffic must have been struck by a medical problem. Otherwise, how could anyone possibly make such an error?

One of the customers she gave a ride to later that same day believed otherwise. He thought it was most likely driver distraction. His job, perhaps as an EMT, had put him as a first responder at many accident scenes and in such cases it almost always proved to be driver distraction, he told her - something like eating a hamburger, drinking coffee, putting on makeup or, most often these days, talking on the phone.

While she respected his expertise, she was not convinced. "If you start to cross four lanes of traffic because you get distracted from drinking a cup of coffee, you're going to figure it out and you can through that cup of coffee aside and save yourself. I still think it was probably a medical problem."

Before she could expound further, her cell phone rang. It was the office, calling to tell her she had a visitor waiting for her. She speculated as to who it could be - a higher up from the work place, perhaps, or, "it might be my boyfriend."

After we turned off the Park's and drove past the Kendall dealership toward the big shop at the back, she studied the cars in the parking lot. "Yep, it's my boyfriend," she said. "There's his car." Then she stopped to let me out. "You have a right good day, sir," she said with that southern accent.

"Where are you originally from?" I asked.

"Viriginia," she said.

Before I went into the office to do the paper work to pick up the loaner car, I saw Mark looking at our Escape. The way he held the blanket kind of reminded me a bit of someone about to drape a shroud over a dead body. I walked over to investigate.

Mark points toward the original problem, before the fuel line was ruptured, and explains how all that stuff that in front of his finger had to get removed before they could replace the bent camshaft in the solenoid. 

This is Sharon, who took care of the paperwork for the loaner car. It was regular rental-car paperwork, it's just that instead of me, Kendall and Ford would pick up the tab. If I heard it, I forgot the name of the lady in pink. She did say that she was glad that it was Sharon who was working with me and who would be in my blog, because she does not think she photographs well and so does not like to appear in pictures.

We had to do a walk around to look for dings, dents, nicks, chips, scrapes, cracks and scratches before I could sign off and take the car. Sharon was very thorough in noting all the little mars, including ones that I would never spotted if she had not pointed them out to me.

On the one hand, this leaves one feeling grateful because now you know that these almost invisible mars are not going to get charged to you, should someone find them on your return. On the other, it makes one nervous, a bit afraid to drive the car much at all because there's no telling what she might discover when you do return it.

While it was a loaner car, the driver is still responsible for any damage it sustains while in his custody. My insurance would be there for big things, but there is always a deductible and I did not want to have to pay any deductible.

I signed for it, then took the car and drove away - feeling very nervous. Remember Larry, the Harley rider who came here from Florida and then gave up motorcyle riding, in part because the air above highways here tends to have an abundance of little rocks and gravel flying through it?

I am certain that you have noticed the cracks that lace our windshield along with the chips that pock it.

Yet, it was not long until I found myself in a parking lot as a train came rumbling past. This is that train, as seen through the windshield of the loaner Escape. I must admit, it is worth the risk, to be able to sit in a loaner Escape and witness such a wonderful, dramatic and exciting sight such as this.

 

That afternoon, I drove the loaner Escape up to the drive-through window at Metro Cafe. Branson, Carmen's four-year old son, rode this bicycle right up to the front of the loaner car, looked at me, smiled, and wiped his nose.

As I drove off with my coffee, I saw these two, through the window of the loaner Escape.

Then I saw this girl walking...

...and this guy riding his bike.

All these things I saw from the loaner Escape. 

When I took it back two nights later, it was given another thorough inspection. Not a single new ding was found in it.

Here I am, back in my own red Ford Escape. I have just driven away from the Ford Kendall shop and am waiting at the intersection so that I can turn onto the Park's Highway. It will be a long wait, as there will be no breaks in the traffic for many minutes.

Given the view, I do not really mind. In fact, if I could show you this picture at its original size, you would see that the words above "MOTEL" on the sign say, "Alaskan View."

Except for the motel, it was a grand Alaskan view indeed.

Oddly enough, every single view that we have around here is an Alaskan view.

Then, of course, someone had to turn in and cut off that view. Fortunately, he would not cut it off for too long.

Unfortunately, the next guy cut the view off even worse. Yet, look at the pleased smile upon his face - it looks like he is returning to Kendall from a test drive in a new car.

I wonder if he bought it?

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